Irrational Childhood Fears

There's an episode in the all-time favourite sitcom 'Friends' that Ross and Rachel revealed their irrational childhood fears. Ross suggested that he would take Emma (their daughter together) to the nearby park to play on the swings. Rachel revealed her irrational fear of 'swings'. The story behind it was that her hair was stuck on the swings and her mother had to cut her hair out. "It was uneven for weeks!".

It had been raining the past few days. It was ok during the weekdays as I would be tired getting home from work and I wouldn't even have the energy to give it any thoughts. It started last night that the satellite TV (Astro) started to go blank due to the rain. It was raining and then came the thunderstorm. It occurred to me that I was alone, and I will be alone for a three day weekend here..eerie..well usually, I am not the type of person that can easily be scared of by ghastly ghoulies. But guess what... I have an irrational childhood fear of..... Heavy Rain!!

I told you, even the title states "irrational". WHy you ask? It's the repetitive loud noise that comes with it, the cold, the unexpected lightning & thunder, it just gives me the creeps. The sound of the raindrops on the roof, on the balcony, tapping on the window (it taps the window!) and most of the time in Malaysia, the rain really does pour you'd think it was hailing stones!

My imagination runs wild with all those horror stories that you've watched when you were a child. Tapping window; sticks from branches of the tree tapping the window and the tree somehow comes alive.... and there isn't even any tree outside my window..argghh. Raindrops on the roof; little devil's minions with green eyes throwing rocks on my roof! Lightning; well I don't think this is irrational, fear of getting struck by lightning, or even any of my electronic appliances. Thunder; generally, I think about how God is made at me. We have our parent's version of being angry, loud voice that scares us..for me, thunder is God being angry....and I get scared.

I remember being a young girl, lying awake staring outside the window. I saw the shapes and pattern of the lightning striking the ground. I'd lie there wide awake thinking, God is angry and he is going to punish us. We would switch off all appliances and go straight to bed, but there was no way that I could sleep till it was over. My heart would beat fast as I lie on my side with my eyes wide open. I couldn't close my eyes as my imagination runs when I can't see. It was better that I saw exactly what was in front of me, than having it drawn inside my head for me. And even today, the exact same thing still happens to me, except, I pretend that I'm not scared....

Well, I do have other childhood irrational fears, among which, is the fear of stepping over dark drains, getting close or even swim in dark waters (even pools)....I'll save those for other entries :o)